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DAMNED IF YA DO, DAMNED IF YA DON'T Wednesday, September 10
The Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species recently estimated that nearly 50,000 African elephants were killed for their tusks in the last two years, continuing the century-long drastic decline in wild pachyderms. The Fish & …
IRONIES Wednesday, September 10
In August, a criminology professor at Rome's La Sapienza University arranged a two-hour guest lecture on "emergency practices" by an "experienced" hand — Francesco Schettino, the captain currently on trial in Italy for his role in the sinking of …
BRIGHT IDEA Wednesday, September 10
Bradley Hardison, 24, on the lam in the Elizabeth City, North Carolina, area from two break-in charges, nonetheless decided to enter a newsworthy contest in August — a public "doughnut-eating" competition, in which police officers and firefighters …
RECURRING THEME Wednesday, September 10
Raymond Betson became the most recent perp (in July in Swanley, England) to intend to break into a store (this time, a money-lending store) by ramming the wall with a digger — but broke through the wrong wall (and then another wrong wall after …
READERS' CHOICE Wednesday, September 10
The tornado that ripped through Kingsport, Tennessee, on July 27 damaged Jerrod Christian's house, leaving furniture and tools strewn about his lawn. Unfortunately, according to police who filed four charges against him the next day, some of the …
RED SPACES Wednesday, September 10
Russian researchers launched several critters into space on July 19, including a male and four female geckos (to follow their mating capabilities), but by July 25 reported they had lost contact with the satellite, drawing comical concern (most …
COME FLY WITH ME Wednesday, August 13
The May 28 US Airways flight from LA to Philly was diverted to Kansas City after a passenger's service dog did what dogs do, in the aisle, twice (an hour apart). One passenger used the terms "lingering smell," "dry heaving" and "throwing up" in …
LEAST COMPETENT FUZZ Wednesday, August 13
Clay County, Florida, Sheriff's Office twice this year arrested the wrong Ashley Chiasson — in January (for grand theft) and in May (writing bad checks) — despite three years, five inches, 20 pounds and middle names separating them (Ashley …
DEMOCRACY IN ACTION Wednesday, August 13
Steve Grossman, Massachusetts' state treasurer, who's running for governor, performed heroically at a March candidate forum. The Boston Globe reported Grossman "fervently answered questions on everything from transgender rights [to] sex education …
FAKIN' IT Wednesday, August 13
Steve Wiles got only 28 percent of the vote in his
 
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