NEWS OF THE WEIRD

WHAT EMERGENCY?

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After Maria Montanez-Colon, 58, called 911 in February in Punta Gorda, Fla., the responding officer reported she immediately began fondling him, describing herself as "horny," noting, "I haven't been penetrated in years." The officer politely declined and warned her about frivolous 911 calls, but Montanez-Colon was arrested shortly afterward when she called again, asking the second responding officer, "How else am I going to get [to have sex]?"

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