The Specktator

Public Nuisance

Trying to put a leash on local pet peeves


I’m pissed. And it’s not like it’s one thing that has me miffed.

As much as I love Jacksonville, there are so many things that irritate me about the city—and my fellow residents, such as...

1. City streets that change names. My personal favorite is in San Marco where Gulf Life Drive becomes Riverplace Boulevard, changes back to Gulf Life for a block or two, reverts to Riverplace, before turning into Hendricks Avenue which becomes San Jose Boulevard.

2. The misprounciation of "jaguar." The preferred pronunciation, assuming you trust, is "ja-ˌgwär." For those of you not up on diacritical marks, you can listen to the audio pronunciation on their website. Granted, there are other "acceptable" pronunciations—"jag-gyə-ˌwär" and "jag-gwər," but "jag-wire" and "jag-u-wire" are not two of them. 

3. Not knowing how to merge into traffic. I know this isn't specific to Jacksonville, but it's such a common—not to mention, dangerous—aspect of driving in this city that it bears mentioning. (I would, however, like to give a special shout out to the 1-95 North and South/Fuller Warren Bridge area for being a complete nightmare for merging ... and changing lanes ... and not accidentally ending up at the airport.) Instead of griping any further, I will simply encourage you to watch the video "How to Merge Into Traffic."

4. Adding an "s" to names and places where it doesn't belong. Case in point: Lanes Avenue, Wonderwoods Drive, Scott Mills Road or Dunns Avenue; MOJOS, TacoLus or Tavernas. And while we're on the subject, for the love of sibilance, stop with Walmarts, Kmarts, Barnes & Nobles and Victoria's Secrets. Sssssssso annoying.

5. The nickname "Bold New City of the South." Jacksonville gained its new moniker in 1968 when the city and county governments were consolidated. For starters, it wasn't really a "bold" decision considering the government corruption and political scandals that were going on at the time. As for the "new," Philadelphia beat Jacksonville to the punch by consolidating in the '50s— the 1850s, that is. Even throwing "of the South" in the mix didn't make it any more accurate since other Southern cities did it before Jacksonville, including Clark County/Athens, Ga. which consolidated in 1966. The fact that the nickname wasn't relevant in 1968 makes it that much more annoying today. And don't even get me started with the graphic...

I could go on and on about my personal pet peeves—and I will—in future posts when I am not overcome with anxiety. in the mean time, feel free to share yours in the comments section.

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